another aimless blog

yes, another blog to add to the millions out there already – but why not.

Thunderstruck June 10, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — panthergirl @ 4:24 am
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Today Operation Thunder Thighs began. I'm not trying to find some, rather prevent some from arriving.

It all started about a year ago.

My mother had two knee replacement operations and I went and stayed at their house to look after her. One of my jobs was to put on the compression stockings. And they aren't joking when they use the word compression. So she'd have a shower and stand in front of me. I'd kneel on the floor and wrestle the stockings onto her. After a few weeks doing this I could have killed a person with only my thumbs. It's a tough workout.

Anyway the point is, that one time while I was doing this, I glanced up at my mothers legs and thought –

wow – they sure are chunky thighs.

But it wasn't a huge shock as she's always had terrible legs.

However, last week I stepped out of the shower, bent down to dry my toes, glanced at my legs and thought –

OH MY GOD – those babies could turn into my mothers thighs.

They definitely have the potential. They're still slim, but I can see a similar shape emerging.

Lizzie is also going to begin Operation Thunder Thighs. I was going to say that at 16 she has different goals than me, but I don't think she has actually. I think we're both trying not to turn into our mother.

My friend Jem is going to start Operation Fat Guts. Thats because her mother looks like a ladybeetle. Or a bee. She has the tank middle and skinny legs.

Bloody mothers – pass on all their faulty genes – why can't they be perfect.

My parents between them have already warned me to look out for varicose veins, glaucoma, haemochromatosis and schizophrenia. And now they expect me to deal with fat thighs as well.

So basically the routine will just include more of what we should all be doing.

Less grog – I must say Four Corners scared me off binge drinking (almost) last night with the brain damage angle. Was much more frightening than ManWoman.

Less fat – twisties, chips and gravy, pastry – basically all the tasty stuff. 

Less sugar – no actually I don't eat much sugar – that can stay.

More exercise – I'm excellent at making excuses to get out of exercise, so no more of that. Definitely more leg work.

I was going to take before and after photos but common sense prevailed. I did that once before. I had Daz take some polaroids of me in my undies and bra. I couldn't be bothered taking my jeans off so I just had them bunched around my ankles. So I told him to cut that out of the photo. But he didn't – he put them in and cut my head off instead.

I don't remember if I actually cried or not when I saw them but I knew they must be destroyed instantly. Do you know how hard it is to set a polaroid alight.

So here we go. Operation Thunder Thighs has officially begun.


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19 Responses to “Thunderstruck”

  1. Worker Says:

    I need to join in this operation..were is the dotted line 🙂

  2. cat Says:

    ………………………………………. worker

  3. Worker Says:

    done deal !!!

  4. Candy Sparks Says:

    omg i went to the falls with my friends and kelly took pictures of me in the water… i was horriflied to see how fat my thighs, gut, and arms has gotten… so hence operation fat loss… yeah i've got to stop the fat from destroying my cuteness… lol…


  5. cat Says:

    lol – nothing like a photo of yourself in swimmers to give you a reality check

  6. my hand is up for Operation Fat Slob…… still need to shed 10kg!

  7. cat Says:

    lol – that sounds a bit general. Slob is such a negative word.

  8. Mah Says:

    Is it awful to be glad someone else is going to be suffering with me? lolI began my operation last Friday. So far, so good. Surprising how impending age (I know its only going to get harder) and horrifying mental images of your future can motivate you.

  9. Down & Dirty Says:

    you seriously crack me up.i have been trying to get rid of that last tiny bit of jiggle on my thighs for what seems like forever …but it seems as though the last 5 pounds are always the hardest…for motivation i bought myself a pair of uber-short high-waisted 1950's style pinup shorts…and i'm giving myself until the beginning of july to accomplish my goal. i'm right there with you.good luck 🙂

  10. cat Says:

    Yes I think the secret is that you actually have to try hard. Which is disappointing. I want to see a photo of you in those shorts. I love the high waist pants. Hope you have some cool sunnies to wear with them. (sunglasses that is)

  11. cat Says:

    Every time I think about my mother it sends me to the treadmill. Maybe I need a therapist instead. I'm not very good at suffering.

  12. Down & Dirty Says:

    i can try and take a pic, but i'm so white the glare off my legs will probably completely overexpose the shot 😉

  13. Waterbaby Says:

    will you be celebrating your new mission with a hearty robust beer for stamina?

  14. cat Says:

    That sounds good. About 12 weeks time, the days will be warming up. Find a bit of afternoon sun. Actually I think I shall celebrate with books. Don't really do clothes (well I wear them, but don't enjoy shopping for them) but do love getting lost in a book shop.

  15. Ninja Says:

    Is there a Tuckshop Ladies arm campaign??

  16. cat Says:

    lol – now that should be a national campaign

  17. Operation Greatly Rotund?

  18. cat Says:

    sounds like a magician – The Great Rotunda

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